I realize it’s been a while since I’ve written anything; life, you know? Certainly there’s been no shortage of Toddler Bombs at my house. But I have noticed they are becoming a different kind of bomb.
My daughter is no longer a toddler. She’s four. She’s a kid. A kid with a smart mouth. And an even smarter brain. Here is an example of a day in the life of one of the snarkiest, most intelligent, but still four year olds, I know.
We try to get to our local YMCA a couple times per week so mommy can have a couple hours to exercise (or what we call “eppecise”) and the kids have another opportunity to play with other kids and different toys. Usually when I pick up Vivi I get “She is SO funny…” bla bla. I just smile and nod. I get it. I hear it ALL the time; babysitters, child watch pros, teachers, etc. (in fact after her first day of preschool her teacher proclaimed to me: “She’s the best thing to happen to Room 5.” Ok, that one is just me bragging.) I love that people think my daughter’s hilarious…I just wish she pulled her well behaved funniness out for me more than other people. But I digress…
So earlier this week, I walk in to pick her up from the YMCA Child Watch and the girl tells me how funny Vivi is (yes, yes, I know…) BUT then continues on to tell me that Vivi started a coup in the child watch.
She did what?!
Yes, apparently, my darling, funny four year old started a coup. Nothing too serious mind you. It involved wanting to get out the bean table, but the staff said no. So what did my daughter do? Throw a fit? No (thank goodness because that’s exactly what would’ve happened at home). Apparently, she went around to her child watch friends and gathered supporters. I can see it now. Her standing on the little toy table yelling “What do want?!” and the kids yelling back “Bean table!”
“When do we want it?!”
Ok, I didn’t get the deets and I’m sure that’s not exactly how it happened. But apparently, she did gather enough bean table supporters to convince the staff to get out the bean table.
Vivi won. And, honestly, she usually does.
I was oddly proud that Vivi found a different (and more mature, if not manipulative) way to get what she wanted. My daughter’s first rebellion where she used the power of the masses and not screaming. Yes, proud. And, a little embarrassed. I’m not going to lie, I love that my daughter is stubborn and independent. It makes her hard to deal with now, but who can doubt that she could change the world…for better or worse depending on her mood. I try to foster that independence and critical thinking (don’t ask me how) while still disciplining and correcting her appropriately, but it’s a hard line to walk. And when situations like the rising of a rebellion in the YMCA child watch occur, I do wonder if people wonder “Does that mom let her daughter get everything she wants?”
To be honest, Vivi usually does get a lot of what she wants. Part of that has to do with the fact that I am a reflex “no” mom and after discussing it with Vivi (and her employing her powers of persuasion, sometimes logic, sometimes persistence, etc.) I realize it’s not that big of a deal and let her do/get it (this does NOT apply to buying material things. She rarely gets what she wants when we’re in the store because we are on a budget).
And lest ye think that I simply don’t have rules for my daughter, that brings us to the other event this week that tells me my daughter needs a smarter mom than me:
We were in the car discussing Beauty and the Beast. She asked why the magic fairy put a spell on the Beast. I told her that the Beast wasn’t very nice to the fairy. Of course she asked, “Why?” Knowing where this “Why?” conversation could go, I said (hoping to end the discussion) “He just wasn’t very nice and made bad choices.”
She thought about it for a moment and said, “Maybe he didn’t have a mommmy…Maybe he didn’t have a mommy and daddy to make rules for him.”
Ohhhh, crap. So she understands the importance of rules, obviously. She just doesn’t like them or want to play by my rules. I’ve long known that my daughter is a boundary pusher, but this just tells me she knows EXACTLY what she’s doing because she obviously understands the value of rules.
And I don’t think I’ve ever explained that part to her.
See? She’s just too smart for me. *slaps head